Im too depressed

I'm clinically depressed, but undiagnosed and my father doesn't know. Only my friends know and it only seems to get worse and worse over time...

It runs in my family as well.
My mom killed herself almost 2 years ago on monthers day. She also had depression. I have a fear that someday I will end up like her. And I'm on a path there already.

I don't know what to do. I want to be on something to rid me of the depression. Something that will really work. But I don't want my dad to know that I'm depressed and think I'm some sort of freak. Because he's confronted me about it before... and I just shrugged it off saying, "No, I'm not depressed, why would you think that." But he's seen the cuts... I don't know if he hears me crying though.
Category General Confession