Love...in a way

I finally feel happy for once in my life, but I've already cheating on my boyfriend. He tells me if it happens again, we're completely over and he'll never talk to me. I regretted the last time I cheated, but I can't handle just having 1 guy for a long amount of time. I don't want to feel like I could have had something better. I've been tempted to cheat again, even though it ends up killing me. I'm scared it'll just happen, but this time I can't come clean to him or I'll lose him. I can honestly say I don't know what to do.
Category General Confession