Placing Love

I place all of my love in other people. I never feel cared for and when anyone, even my parents, spend money on me, I feel guilty. Because I am worthless and I hate who I am. When I eat I feel guilty so I throw it back up and I can't stop. I can't stop hating myself so someone could possibly care about me. I feel like everyone is disposable. I can lose friends and it doesn't matter because they've never cared.
I am in love with one man. He is the only non-disposable person in my life. And I cannot get him to care for me either.
Category General Confession