Reformed Sl__

Sure I haven't slept with anyone but my husband in over 10 years - but before that? I lost count somewhere in the early triple digits...

How am I supposed to raise my daughter to respect herself when I'm such a horrible example?
Should I lie?
Category Dirty Little Secret

advice from Guest2316136 | 02-13-2007 18:23 | E : 2 | S : 0
some things children do not need to know
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advice from Guest2263624 | 02-08-2007 09:12 | E : 1 | S : 0
that is truley up to you. if you feel comfortable sharing it with your daughter then by all means you should. but i personally wouldnt bring it up out of nowhere. it can be traumatic for a young girl to be sat down and have her mothers mistakes poured out to her. trust me. my mother was alot like you. i learned all her secrets when i was about 12 and it was hard to hear. i still love my mother, regardless of her faults, and i feel that she has givin me a concrete example of what not to be. sometimes i wish i didnt know, but it has made me a stronger person for knowing and dealing with it. whether or not to tell her is completely up to you, but if she asks- dont lie- you can leave things out, but dont lie...
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advice from Guest2306855 | 02-13-2007 01:06 | E : 1 | S : 0
tell her about it when she's old enough. you'll build more rapport and there won't be any fear of her finding it out thru other people. being a person who has "been there, done that" would make you a more reliable guide on why she shouldn't be promiscuous...emphasize the reasons why you decided to change your ways and stick with just one man...
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advice from Guest821011 | 02-05-2007 17:42 | E : 0 | S : 0
You can lie, but you don't have to. My father had every vice known to man and I didn't end up following in his footsteps.
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advice from Guest2241258 | 02-06-2007 11:02 | E : 0 | S : 0
There is no need to even bring it up. Just forget it, it is in the past and after ten year I would let it go. There is enough to worry about in the future, forget the errors of the past. That person is not the person you are today, forgive yourself and move on and be happy with who you are now and with your husband and daughter..
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advice from Guest2245824 | 02-06-2007 19:38 | E : 0 | S : 0
Yes. Just teach her the difference between right and wrong and do not judge her for her mistakes. She will make a few, but do not blame yourself.
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advice from Guest2402529 | 02-23-2007 09:57 | E : 0 | S : 0
infact you should be proud that you have come out of a messed up life and had the strength to undo whats wrong. Mistakes corrected is better than mistakes repeated!!!
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advice from Guest2421302 | 02-25-2007 09:57 | E : 0 | S : 0
it's not lying if no one ever brings it up.
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advice from Guest2512791 | 03-07-2007 16:29 | E : 0 | S : 0
it's ok. move on. i know it's easier said than done. but somethings are better left unsaid! good luck
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advice from Guest2572473 | 03-14-2007 20:47 | E : 0 | S : 0
It's usually better to teach children about the lessons that you've learned, rather than tell them all about your experiences. If they ask, It's better to tell the truth. Kids can usually tell when their parents are lying, which kinda ends up nullifying most of anything you tell them. To teach honesty is to be honest. To teach respect is to have respect.

Chances are they won't ask how many people you've slept with though, it's usually a pretty touchy subject for a kid.
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advice from Guest2478358 | 03-15-2007 19:33 | E : 0 | S : 0
35
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advice from Guest2672193 | 03-25-2007 22:52 | E : 0 | S : 0
I wouldn't. Being honest is good for mother/ daughter relationships. Tells when she mature enough to fully understand the topic. Your not a horrible example since you have recovered and want your daughter to respect herself.
you talk about your past self and how that behavior affected you and why she shouldn't go down the path you went.
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advice from Guest2855661 | 04-13-2007 16:55 | E : 0 | S : 0
I don't think she needs to know. We live in a very different world today where kids are starting their sexual activities and drug use younger and younger. I'd say you have a full plate already just dealing witht the social pressures she's going to endure in her immediate future. No need to give her further "permission" by exposing your own past. It's your business and no one else's.
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advice from Guest3120644 | 05-13-2007 23:59 | E : 0 | S : 0
The important thing is that you no longer sleep around. You are the perfect example to encourage your daughter to respect herself, becaue you actually know
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advice from Guest3120644 | 05-13-2007 23:59 | E : 0 | S : 0
The important thing is that you no longer sleep around. You are the perfect example to encourage your daughter to respect herself, becaue you actually know
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advice from Guest3351711 | 07-09-2007 23:01 | E : 0 | S : 0
By telling her, your saving your daughter from the mistakes you made
tell her about the consequences/ how you felt etc
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advice from Guest838689 | 08-31-2007 04:44 | E : 0 | S : 0
First off, don't call yourself a slut. No woman deserves to be called that, especially when a man who does the same is a "player". It doesn't make you a bad person or anything. Just advise your daughter to be safe in all that she does. You don't have to bring it up if you don't want to talk about your own personal experiences, but teach her that the numbers don't matter- it's how you feel about sex and what you're comfortable with that counts.
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advice from Guest908149 | 09-10-2007 02:10 | E : 0 | S : 0
it's who you are today that counts.
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advice from Guest1063388 | 10-03-2007 01:14 | E : 0 | S : 0
Well your expirenes will teach her, tell her what you regret about it and what you don't. If she makes lots of mistakes even with all of your advice, it was bound to happen anyway.
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