I don't want to be any of this, and living daily is a constant fight again the fear of someone finding out about me being gay and a 21 year old virgin. I wanna be friends with guys, but it seems difficult to get their accaptance because they see this weird, flamboyant gay person in me. I loath being reduced to being flamboyant. I really don't want to be gay and I will never actually admit it to anyone. So, knowing that my future life will consist of me, covering up and fighting my homosexualty and finding a woman and to have children seems rather depressing.
